1. Jessica Alba may be engaged.
2. Madonna still likes Rosie...but Brit? Not so much. Oh, and she's still trying to pull off that b.s. english accent. You are from Detroit, Madge. I can't believe how much this still bugs me. That, and how she lets her roots show. I do, but that's because I can't afford to get my hair colored every 8 weeks. That crazy ho has Like a Virgin money. COVER YOUR ROOTS.
3. Oprah hates my guts because she's allowing Julia Roberts to interview George Clooney for her Oscar special. Why do you hate me so, O? And isn't having a Barbara Walters Oscar special bad enough?
4. Paris Hilton is dumb.
5. David and Posh Spice Beckham are going to move to America and quickly discover no one gives a crap.
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