Ugh. Meghan Fox is hosting.
Don't let that scare you. Trannies need work, too! I know many have compared her to Angie Jolie, but I think that is an insult to Angie (and isn't Jennifer Aniston in charge of all Angie insults?)....unless she's down with the drag.
More importantly, U2 is the musical guest. Last time they performed on the show, Amy Poehler was so excited she cried. I hope she is there tomorrow night.
Larry, please wear a white tee. Thanks.
On a completely different note, I was happy to read that one of my favorite character actresses, Amy Aquino, has been elected as SAG Secretary-Treasurer. Amy played the pivotal role of Dr. Toni Pavone on Felicity from 2000-2002. What a pistol! She told it like it was, and wouldn't let Benjamin Covington get away with just being cute. She meant business! And she would blow smoke in your face to prove that she was not having any of your nonsense.
Congrats to Amy.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
She makes it too easy
I can't stand Jennifer Garner.
True story.
Her "oh golly" attitude grated ever since she dropped Michael Vartan for Benji Affleck. My Sidney Bristow was dead to me, as was Jen's appeal. NEXT!
Last night, in a segment on Jay Leno's show entitled "Earn Your Plug," she had to name the starting lineup of the Boston Red Sox while wearing a Yankees cap (she's not worthy) and holding a framed photo of Derek Jeter (again, not worthy).
J Gar decides to be "cute" by wearing the cap backwards (Uh, you are no Luke Danes!) and stating that Jeter was her "least favorite Yankee." Say what, ho? Is it because he doesn't freebase steroids like Papi or display full on roid rage like her beloved Youk? Bitch, please. Go buy some Rogaine for your husband and shut it.
Varty, she did you a favor.
True story.
Her "oh golly" attitude grated ever since she dropped Michael Vartan for Benji Affleck. My Sidney Bristow was dead to me, as was Jen's appeal. NEXT!
Last night, in a segment on Jay Leno's show entitled "Earn Your Plug," she had to name the starting lineup of the Boston Red Sox while wearing a Yankees cap (she's not worthy) and holding a framed photo of Derek Jeter (again, not worthy).
J Gar decides to be "cute" by wearing the cap backwards (Uh, you are no Luke Danes!) and stating that Jeter was her "least favorite Yankee." Say what, ho? Is it because he doesn't freebase steroids like Papi or display full on roid rage like her beloved Youk? Bitch, please. Go buy some Rogaine for your husband and shut it.
Varty, she did you a favor.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
The Office returns tonight
Season 6? Amazing.
Tonight at 9:00, The Office returns with a season that will undoubtedly bring a lot of changes to Dunder Mifflin. Jim knocked up Pam, and those two crazy kids are getting hitched this season.
Karen who?
*30 Rock returns next month, so don't fret when you see SNL on for the next few weeks. Liz Lemon will be giving us some more deal breakers before you know it.*
Enjoy the return of Thursday Night comedy!
Tonight at 9:00, The Office returns with a season that will undoubtedly bring a lot of changes to Dunder Mifflin. Jim knocked up Pam, and those two crazy kids are getting hitched this season.
Karen who?
*30 Rock returns next month, so don't fret when you see SNL on for the next few weeks. Liz Lemon will be giving us some more deal breakers before you know it.*
Enjoy the return of Thursday Night comedy!
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
After Hancock, it was time to head back to the hotel to regroup, recharge, and watch a few minutes of The Rachel Zoe Project. Oh, the drama!
That show is hilarious because it involves people that think forgetting nipple tape the day of an awards show is the most horrific thing in the history of the world. The horror! Forget homelessness, AIDS, poverty, and famine. If Eva Mendes doesn't have the right pair of shoes for a red carpet, well, expect Armageddon and take cover with some Valium. It is one of the funniest hours on television. And it isn't supposed to be.
After trying to figure out where to eat that wouldn't require a reservation, we settled on D4 Irish Pub and Cafe. Fabulous grilled veggie sandwich! Yummy. Our very nice waiter couldn't understand why we would spend so much money to see U2. *smack* Less tip for you, buddy. Kidding!
Then we were off to the show. Hailed a cab and dealt with some Soldier's Field traffic. Understandable. And just happy that we didn't have to deal with parking. So nice. Took about 20 minutes and then we were just walking with the masses. Weather was perfect and everyone was in a good mood.
We missed Snow Patrol, which wasn't a big deal. I liked their first album, but haven't really followed them since. Now it was just a matter of waiting for Bono and the boys.
The lights went down at 8:50 and Larry Mullen, Jr. walked out to his drum kit. AAHHHHH! I love you, Larry! Larry is my type of guy: he calls Bono on his b.s. and stays out of the spotlight. Plus, he's cute! And he seems to never age. Is he a robot?
The band played until 11:00, giving us new material from their latest album, as well as all-time favorites. It was a good mix, although I could live without ever hearing "Pride" or "Sunday Bloody Sunday" again. I'm sorry, but I've heard them since 1987. Yes, that's right. THE 80s. Gah, I'm old.
The crowd was fantastic. From the moment the lights went down, everyone was on their feet. Thank you! If I wanted to sit, I would have stayed in my apartment and listened to the cd (which was a suggestion from my father). People sang along and danced as only U2 fans can. There is always at least one guy at a U2 show that likes to pump his fist into the air. I don't understand it, but I observe it and laugh. All hail weirdos!
Well, that is recap of my fabulous Chicago getaway. This Sunday I am off to Gillette Stadium in MA to see the boys again. Hope the weather cooperates, as stadium shows don't provide cover. And I will GO OFF if it rains. True story.
More celeb-centered news to come!
That show is hilarious because it involves people that think forgetting nipple tape the day of an awards show is the most horrific thing in the history of the world. The horror! Forget homelessness, AIDS, poverty, and famine. If Eva Mendes doesn't have the right pair of shoes for a red carpet, well, expect Armageddon and take cover with some Valium. It is one of the funniest hours on television. And it isn't supposed to be.
After trying to figure out where to eat that wouldn't require a reservation, we settled on D4 Irish Pub and Cafe. Fabulous grilled veggie sandwich! Yummy. Our very nice waiter couldn't understand why we would spend so much money to see U2. *smack* Less tip for you, buddy. Kidding!
Then we were off to the show. Hailed a cab and dealt with some Soldier's Field traffic. Understandable. And just happy that we didn't have to deal with parking. So nice. Took about 20 minutes and then we were just walking with the masses. Weather was perfect and everyone was in a good mood.
We missed Snow Patrol, which wasn't a big deal. I liked their first album, but haven't really followed them since. Now it was just a matter of waiting for Bono and the boys.
The lights went down at 8:50 and Larry Mullen, Jr. walked out to his drum kit. AAHHHHH! I love you, Larry! Larry is my type of guy: he calls Bono on his b.s. and stays out of the spotlight. Plus, he's cute! And he seems to never age. Is he a robot?
The band played until 11:00, giving us new material from their latest album, as well as all-time favorites. It was a good mix, although I could live without ever hearing "Pride" or "Sunday Bloody Sunday" again. I'm sorry, but I've heard them since 1987. Yes, that's right. THE 80s. Gah, I'm old.
The crowd was fantastic. From the moment the lights went down, everyone was on their feet. Thank you! If I wanted to sit, I would have stayed in my apartment and listened to the cd (which was a suggestion from my father). People sang along and danced as only U2 fans can. There is always at least one guy at a U2 show that likes to pump his fist into the air. I don't understand it, but I observe it and laugh. All hail weirdos!
Well, that is recap of my fabulous Chicago getaway. This Sunday I am off to Gillette Stadium in MA to see the boys again. Hope the weather cooperates, as stadium shows don't provide cover. And I will GO OFF if it rains. True story.
More celeb-centered news to come!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Day 2: Or how I managed to stay awake past midnight
Saturday was full throttle action. Like a big budget summer movie, but with good characters and a plot.
We were out of the hotel by 9:15 and headed over to West Egg Cafe (recommended by The Diva). Very popular place, as we had about a 20 minute wait. Luckily, the food was good. Excellent raisin bread french toast.
Then we were off and running to Navy Pier. Amusement rides for the kids (and those that are kids at heart)could be seen as you make your way through a nice park. There was even a hot air balloon that looked like a vomit-inducing accident waiting to happen. No thank you.
We decided on the 90-minute boat tour through Mercury Cruiseline called the "Urban Adventure." It is a river and lake cruise, and for one price, you also get access to the John Hancock Tower. Great deal!
Our tour guide on the boat was a good enough guy, but it was like anytime you take a guided tour: everyone has to be a comedian. My dad would love this job! Give him a microphone and he'd be off and running. Through the course of the tour, we learned that our guide was the waiter for Tom Cruise and Rebecca DeMornay in their dining scene at the end of Risky Business. I wanted to raise my hand and ask questions about Tom, but it just wasn't the appropriate time.
After seeing the sights and enduring the swells (thanks, speedboats!), it was time for dry land and we were off to Millennium Park.
What fun. Crazies all around! There was a protest against Healthcare. Or they were for it but didn't like Obama's plan. Couldn't figure it out. There was also a group wearing masks and protesting Scientology. Xenu would not be happy! Apparently, it was Tom Cruise day in Chicago. Couldn't get away from mentions of him. Someone held a "Honk if you hate Scientology" sign. Honk!
Then we were off to the Hancock building. I was starting to lose steam, but once up on the 92nd floor, I got a 2nd wind. Beautiful views from all sides. David Schwimmer even provides an audio tour (and he isn't annoying). The scariest part was that one minute you would have a crystal clear view of the city, and the next, you would be enveloped by cloud cover. Or was it pollution? Spooky.
I'm breaking this up into two posts because I'm lazy. More tomorrow!
We were out of the hotel by 9:15 and headed over to West Egg Cafe (recommended by The Diva). Very popular place, as we had about a 20 minute wait. Luckily, the food was good. Excellent raisin bread french toast.
Then we were off and running to Navy Pier. Amusement rides for the kids (and those that are kids at heart)could be seen as you make your way through a nice park. There was even a hot air balloon that looked like a vomit-inducing accident waiting to happen. No thank you.
We decided on the 90-minute boat tour through Mercury Cruiseline called the "Urban Adventure." It is a river and lake cruise, and for one price, you also get access to the John Hancock Tower. Great deal!
Our tour guide on the boat was a good enough guy, but it was like anytime you take a guided tour: everyone has to be a comedian. My dad would love this job! Give him a microphone and he'd be off and running. Through the course of the tour, we learned that our guide was the waiter for Tom Cruise and Rebecca DeMornay in their dining scene at the end of Risky Business. I wanted to raise my hand and ask questions about Tom, but it just wasn't the appropriate time.
After seeing the sights and enduring the swells (thanks, speedboats!), it was time for dry land and we were off to Millennium Park.
What fun. Crazies all around! There was a protest against Healthcare. Or they were for it but didn't like Obama's plan. Couldn't figure it out. There was also a group wearing masks and protesting Scientology. Xenu would not be happy! Apparently, it was Tom Cruise day in Chicago. Couldn't get away from mentions of him. Someone held a "Honk if you hate Scientology" sign. Honk!
Then we were off to the Hancock building. I was starting to lose steam, but once up on the 92nd floor, I got a 2nd wind. Beautiful views from all sides. David Schwimmer even provides an audio tour (and he isn't annoying). The scariest part was that one minute you would have a crystal clear view of the city, and the next, you would be enveloped by cloud cover. Or was it pollution? Spooky.
I'm breaking this up into two posts because I'm lazy. More tomorrow!
Monday, September 14, 2009
Look what the windy city blew in
A new blog post!
Yes, it's been ages. One reader asked if I was too busy planning the Bluntski wedding to post. Sadly, my offer to help with the seating chart has not yet been acknowledged.
Actually, I had been getting ready for my trip to Chicago. Oprah and Gayle were going to give me an exclusive sit down interview, but then cancelled last minute. Bitches. Well, when one door closes, another opens. Guess I'll just have to settle on seeing U2 kick off their North American tour.
Yes, that'll do.
Chicago is a beautiful city. Arrived Friday afternoon and barely stopped until I was on the plane headed home yesterday (thanks for the motion sickness, Delta!!). Went with my friend Becky. That girl likes to sightsee. We saw a lot of the city in two short days. Thanks for not failing me, flip flops!
We checked into the hotel (Inn of Chicago) around 3 o'clock after taking the train from Midway. Very convenient, by the way. And cost-conscious. Thanks, Orange Line!
Then we were off and running. Walked down Michigan Ave. Turns out U2 gave an interview at the NBC building earlier in the day. Hmmm....inconvenient, boys. Next time, plan according to our schedule. Thanks.
Saw the Hershey Store with the 5lb Hershey bar. Created with me in mind? I somehow resisted. Walked up Lake Shore Drive. Gorgeous places with water views. There were 3-bedrooms starting at 1.4 million. Cheap. I would have asked Opes for a loan if she had bothered to show.
Then it was back to the hotel to rest like I'm 80. I was jet lagged!
Around 7 we headed off for dinner. Oh Friday night in Chicago. 90 minute waits will not do. So, we couldn't enjoy Giordano's. Then we walked, and walked, and tried our hand at LUXBAR (after passing Gibson's Steakhouse and seeing Jesse Jackson enjoying dinner outside). Thank you LUXBAR. Outstanding veggie burger. One of the best I've ever had. And a tasty ginger fizz didn't hurt, either (sounds gross, but tasted like peach). Tried to get a drink at Gibson's afterwards, but we scoped out the bar and only saw overdressed and annoying non-celebrities. Next!
More to come.....
Yes, it's been ages. One reader asked if I was too busy planning the Bluntski wedding to post. Sadly, my offer to help with the seating chart has not yet been acknowledged.
Actually, I had been getting ready for my trip to Chicago. Oprah and Gayle were going to give me an exclusive sit down interview, but then cancelled last minute. Bitches. Well, when one door closes, another opens. Guess I'll just have to settle on seeing U2 kick off their North American tour.
Yes, that'll do.
Chicago is a beautiful city. Arrived Friday afternoon and barely stopped until I was on the plane headed home yesterday (thanks for the motion sickness, Delta!!). Went with my friend Becky. That girl likes to sightsee. We saw a lot of the city in two short days. Thanks for not failing me, flip flops!
We checked into the hotel (Inn of Chicago) around 3 o'clock after taking the train from Midway. Very convenient, by the way. And cost-conscious. Thanks, Orange Line!
Then we were off and running. Walked down Michigan Ave. Turns out U2 gave an interview at the NBC building earlier in the day. Hmmm....inconvenient, boys. Next time, plan according to our schedule. Thanks.
Saw the Hershey Store with the 5lb Hershey bar. Created with me in mind? I somehow resisted. Walked up Lake Shore Drive. Gorgeous places with water views. There were 3-bedrooms starting at 1.4 million. Cheap. I would have asked Opes for a loan if she had bothered to show.
Then it was back to the hotel to rest like I'm 80. I was jet lagged!
Around 7 we headed off for dinner. Oh Friday night in Chicago. 90 minute waits will not do. So, we couldn't enjoy Giordano's. Then we walked, and walked, and tried our hand at LUXBAR (after passing Gibson's Steakhouse and seeing Jesse Jackson enjoying dinner outside). Thank you LUXBAR. Outstanding veggie burger. One of the best I've ever had. And a tasty ginger fizz didn't hurt, either (sounds gross, but tasted like peach). Tried to get a drink at Gibson's afterwards, but we scoped out the bar and only saw overdressed and annoying non-celebrities. Next!
More to come.....
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