The next film in the Batman series may have a lot of teeth and gums in it. Well, it will if Miley has anything to say about it!
According to The Globe (uh, yeah), young Ms. Cyrus took off her Hannah Montana weave, threw on a batsuit, and tried to pitch herself to Warner Bros. execs as Batgirl.
Say what now?
The mere thought is turning this rainy day into pure golden sunshine. Oh, that is priceless. Was Billy Ray there to throw out lines of dialogue for her to react to? Did one of the Jonai don a Robin suit and ignite a gay gasp in the conference room? Did Sean Young (who, years ago, dressed as Catwoman and embarrassed herself in front of movie execs) pull her suit out of storage and practice purring in front of a mirror?
Oh, the questions raised by this "story." Gold, Jerry!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Everybody hates Gwyneth, but the Brange likes Mickey D's
GOOP herself was not at Comic Con this weekend. Robert Downey Jr, Jon Favreau, and ScarJo were all there promoting Iron Man 2 without the greatest living actress alive. Was she too busy polishing her Oscar? Perhaps she was in the midst of one of her detox cleanses and couldn't leave the bathroom. Or maybe no one asked her stank self to participate and ScarJo is the woman to get all the press this go round and Bye, Gwyneth!
Let's go with the last one.
(In all honesty, is ScarJo that much better? She acts the fool when she is papped at LAX and covers her face. Ugh. Stop, ScarJo. And tell your husband to get the stick out of his ass, as well. A few more box office bombs and he'll be lucky to be asked back for the Two Guys and a Girl tv movie.)
In other news, the Brange was spotted with some of their brood at a McDonald's drive thru this past weekend. HOW FUN! Could you imagine handing over a bag to Brad filled with some fries and a 6-piece mcnuggets? Hilarious. From the looks of her, I'm pretty confident Angie got a soda at most. Girl, enjoy those fries. They are the best and finally cooked in vegetable oil (or so they say).
Live a little, Angie!
Let's go with the last one.
(In all honesty, is ScarJo that much better? She acts the fool when she is papped at LAX and covers her face. Ugh. Stop, ScarJo. And tell your husband to get the stick out of his ass, as well. A few more box office bombs and he'll be lucky to be asked back for the Two Guys and a Girl tv movie.)
In other news, the Brange was spotted with some of their brood at a McDonald's drive thru this past weekend. HOW FUN! Could you imagine handing over a bag to Brad filled with some fries and a 6-piece mcnuggets? Hilarious. From the looks of her, I'm pretty confident Angie got a soda at most. Girl, enjoy those fries. They are the best and finally cooked in vegetable oil (or so they say).
Live a little, Angie!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Joey Potter kicks up her heels
Oy.
I don't normally watch So You Think You Can Dance because I only have room for one dance competition in my life and that is Dancing with the Stars. I need some type of celeb to get me to watch, even if they are C or below. Plus, who doesn't love watching Bruno and Len out queen each other? Girls, simmer!
Well, tonight Ms. Katie Holmes is going to borrow a pair of Tom's wedges and strut her stuff on SYTYCD on behalf of the Dizzy Feet Foundation. It's a charity she co-founded to support art studies scholarships for kids. Nice job, Katie. Or Kate. Or Robot. Whichever she answers to these days.
This performance was pre-taped, as Katie is now in Australia shooting a movie. (No, it's not her own version of Benji Button, where instead of getting younger, Katie ages by decades in just a few years. Oh, girl. Doesn't Tom have some concealer you can borrow? Those bags aren't going to cover themselves. At least mine don't.)
Was Tom in the audience when this was taped? Was Katie audited before or after by fellow Scientologists? Are any male dancers involved, and did Tommy Boy hand pick them himself? Questions that need answers!
SYTYCD is on at some point tonight on FOX. I'm guessing an 8:00 start with it being the show's 100th episode.
I don't normally watch So You Think You Can Dance because I only have room for one dance competition in my life and that is Dancing with the Stars. I need some type of celeb to get me to watch, even if they are C or below. Plus, who doesn't love watching Bruno and Len out queen each other? Girls, simmer!
Well, tonight Ms. Katie Holmes is going to borrow a pair of Tom's wedges and strut her stuff on SYTYCD on behalf of the Dizzy Feet Foundation. It's a charity she co-founded to support art studies scholarships for kids. Nice job, Katie. Or Kate. Or Robot. Whichever she answers to these days.
This performance was pre-taped, as Katie is now in Australia shooting a movie. (No, it's not her own version of Benji Button, where instead of getting younger, Katie ages by decades in just a few years. Oh, girl. Doesn't Tom have some concealer you can borrow? Those bags aren't going to cover themselves. At least mine don't.)
Was Tom in the audience when this was taped? Was Katie audited before or after by fellow Scientologists? Are any male dancers involved, and did Tommy Boy hand pick them himself? Questions that need answers!
SYTYCD is on at some point tonight on FOX. I'm guessing an 8:00 start with it being the show's 100th episode.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Chris Brown stole my shirt...kind of
Did you check out the Chris Brown apology video on You Tube? Bitch, please!
First of all, I had a similar shirt to the one he wears in the video when I was in junior high. Ummm....that was in the 80s. Are those shirts making a comeback? Are off center buttons going to be the rage again? Were they ever? I swear that I got that shirt at a cool store. Ummm....possibly. Anyway, is Chris trying to bring this look back to distract people from his nonsense? Nice try, ass. Those gold buttons can only distract for so long!
Secondly, he beat the crap out of Rihanna in February. It's now the third week in July. 5 months for your lawyer to come up with a few minutes of dialogue, have someone write it out on cue cards, find an empty office, and rummage through my Good Will bag so you can have something to wear on camera? Really? Hmmm...FAIL!
Is this ass releasing an album soon? Have we been witness to opening night of the Chris Brown Apology Tour? I'm not buying. Who has money after buying U2 tickets? Those boys don't come cheap. And I don't condone violence that you get a slap on the wrist for after spending months jet skiing and hanging out at clubs like you don't have a care in the world.
Chris, get some counseling and stop this charade. Take some time off and get your life together.
My name is Judgey McJudgerson and I approve this message. Without buttons.
First of all, I had a similar shirt to the one he wears in the video when I was in junior high. Ummm....that was in the 80s. Are those shirts making a comeback? Are off center buttons going to be the rage again? Were they ever? I swear that I got that shirt at a cool store. Ummm....possibly. Anyway, is Chris trying to bring this look back to distract people from his nonsense? Nice try, ass. Those gold buttons can only distract for so long!
Secondly, he beat the crap out of Rihanna in February. It's now the third week in July. 5 months for your lawyer to come up with a few minutes of dialogue, have someone write it out on cue cards, find an empty office, and rummage through my Good Will bag so you can have something to wear on camera? Really? Hmmm...FAIL!
Is this ass releasing an album soon? Have we been witness to opening night of the Chris Brown Apology Tour? I'm not buying. Who has money after buying U2 tickets? Those boys don't come cheap. And I don't condone violence that you get a slap on the wrist for after spending months jet skiing and hanging out at clubs like you don't have a care in the world.
Chris, get some counseling and stop this charade. Take some time off and get your life together.
My name is Judgey McJudgerson and I approve this message. Without buttons.
Friday, July 17, 2009
This week sucked
Being the lone administrative drone in the office meant not only extra work, but extra time pretending to care. Ugh. No, you don't have to announce you are going to lunch when I see you leave everyday at the same time. Also, please cut down on the amount of cologne you subject the entire office to. Oh, and please shut your office door so that I am not subjected to phone calls with your brother, who, for some reason that only God knows, you feel the need to call by name every five seconds.
For example: Tom, I'm serious. No, Tom, Tom, seriously, Tom. No, Tom. I mean, Tom.....
While that is going on, I have a look on my face similar to the one Esther wears in the poster for the upcoming film, Orphan. Esther is supposed to be a little devil, but she may be my new hero. I won't judge until I see how annoying that step family is. Maybe they talk on the phone and repeat someone's name over and over. If so, Team Esther!
Yanks are back in action after the All-Star break, so let's hope there is some life in their bats (and HGH in their bodies). I'm sure with a few extra days of sun, A-Hole will be glowing a new shade of orange.
500 Days of Summer opens today. Go out and see it. Looks good and has the makings of my favorite summer film. Until I see Orphan, of course. Don't burn me alive, Esther!
Regular blogging next week....whatever that means.
For example: Tom, I'm serious. No, Tom, Tom, seriously, Tom. No, Tom. I mean, Tom.....
While that is going on, I have a look on my face similar to the one Esther wears in the poster for the upcoming film, Orphan. Esther is supposed to be a little devil, but she may be my new hero. I won't judge until I see how annoying that step family is. Maybe they talk on the phone and repeat someone's name over and over. If so, Team Esther!
Yanks are back in action after the All-Star break, so let's hope there is some life in their bats (and HGH in their bodies). I'm sure with a few extra days of sun, A-Hole will be glowing a new shade of orange.
500 Days of Summer opens today. Go out and see it. Looks good and has the makings of my favorite summer film. Until I see Orphan, of course. Don't burn me alive, Esther!
Regular blogging next week....whatever that means.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Sam Ronson hates celebrity home tours
This reminds me of when I went on one with a friend years ago. We drove by the Menendez home and some people that were out on the balcony gave us the finger.
Anyway, Samantha Ronson's home in LA is now a stop on one of those star tours and skinny little Sam has her high tops in a bunch over it. She recently tweeted that she told a tour guide to STFU. Oh, Sam.
I thought the only time DJ Sam was home was late at night/early morning when she is woken up by the sound of Lindsay screaming that she's been robbed or that someone hacked her Blackberry. Wouldn't you think Sam would rather deal with a tour guide than Lindsay? I would. Crack is whack, yo!
If it gets to be too much I'm sure Sam will pack up her stereo and headphones and move out of LA. Because it must be nice to have money to do that. Ugh.
STFU, indeed.
Happy Friday, everyone!
Anyway, Samantha Ronson's home in LA is now a stop on one of those star tours and skinny little Sam has her high tops in a bunch over it. She recently tweeted that she told a tour guide to STFU. Oh, Sam.
I thought the only time DJ Sam was home was late at night/early morning when she is woken up by the sound of Lindsay screaming that she's been robbed or that someone hacked her Blackberry. Wouldn't you think Sam would rather deal with a tour guide than Lindsay? I would. Crack is whack, yo!
If it gets to be too much I'm sure Sam will pack up her stereo and headphones and move out of LA. Because it must be nice to have money to do that. Ugh.
STFU, indeed.
Happy Friday, everyone!
Thursday, July 09, 2009
Sheer black shirts on men
Ummmm.....
I don't know where to begin.
Oh, here: MEN SHOULD NEVER WEAR THEM. I don't care if you find one in your size or if your girlfriend says you'll be the cutest guy in Da Club if you wear one. First of all, Gag! Secondly, your girlfriend is a loser if she thinks you should wear one and maybe you need to think about why you attract losers over a glass of wine and a good self-help book.
Let's start at the beginning: I used to have a huge crush on Jude Law. Like, I bought magazines if he was on the cover. (How I could afford that when I made less money than I do now is not something to dwell on). Anyway, if you don't know who Jude Law is or are making a face at the mere mention of his name, remember two things: I said USED TO have a crush, as in 'past tense' and ummmm.....did you not see The Talented Mr. Ripley?
Jude was beautiful. Seriously. That accent, that smile, that gleam in his eye. And obviously he was a good actor because he had to put up with Gwyneth's stank attitude but you never saw a hint of "Bitch, please!" on his face.
Jude was fab and everyone loved his performance and he was nominated for Best Supporting Actor by the Academy and won the BAFTA for the role. And he was gracious and charming and married to Sadie Frost and blah blah blah.
Then came the remake of Alfie and his fateful meeting with Sienna Miller.
From then on it was not pretty. Like Maddie without makeup. Left Sadie for Sienna, then had an affair with the nanny, and his career was on a downturn and the more his hair started to recede it was like his body was working against him and actually saying, "Yeah, we want out, you perv. Later!"
Haven't felt the same about Jude since the whole Sienna fiasco because I like to judge and she is stank and a skank and why do men leave their wives for her???? Yes, Balthazar Getty, I'm also looking at you and judging. Tsk Tsk.
Flash forward to now and Jude is getting rave reviews for his starring role in Hamlet over in London. And his hair doesn't look as offensive as a few years ago and he's looked better than he has in a long time.
Then I see a pic of him signing for fans outside the theater in a sheer black shirt. With buttons. And a collar. (Not that it would be okay if it were a sheer black tee, but OMG someone put a collar and buttons on that mess and thought that would make it okay? It doesn't.
As if you weren't dead to me before, Jude.
He may as well have been wearing sandals.
UGH.
I know I haven't posted in a few days and my inbox has been flooded with good wishes and questions as to my whereabouts. Well, first of all, BACK OFF! I answer to no one. Secondly, work has been busy and annoying.
Thanks for your concern, George Glass, and others. Appreciate it!
I don't know where to begin.
Oh, here: MEN SHOULD NEVER WEAR THEM. I don't care if you find one in your size or if your girlfriend says you'll be the cutest guy in Da Club if you wear one. First of all, Gag! Secondly, your girlfriend is a loser if she thinks you should wear one and maybe you need to think about why you attract losers over a glass of wine and a good self-help book.
Let's start at the beginning: I used to have a huge crush on Jude Law. Like, I bought magazines if he was on the cover. (How I could afford that when I made less money than I do now is not something to dwell on). Anyway, if you don't know who Jude Law is or are making a face at the mere mention of his name, remember two things: I said USED TO have a crush, as in 'past tense' and ummmm.....did you not see The Talented Mr. Ripley?
Jude was beautiful. Seriously. That accent, that smile, that gleam in his eye. And obviously he was a good actor because he had to put up with Gwyneth's stank attitude but you never saw a hint of "Bitch, please!" on his face.
Jude was fab and everyone loved his performance and he was nominated for Best Supporting Actor by the Academy and won the BAFTA for the role. And he was gracious and charming and married to Sadie Frost and blah blah blah.
Then came the remake of Alfie and his fateful meeting with Sienna Miller.
From then on it was not pretty. Like Maddie without makeup. Left Sadie for Sienna, then had an affair with the nanny, and his career was on a downturn and the more his hair started to recede it was like his body was working against him and actually saying, "Yeah, we want out, you perv. Later!"
Haven't felt the same about Jude since the whole Sienna fiasco because I like to judge and she is stank and a skank and why do men leave their wives for her???? Yes, Balthazar Getty, I'm also looking at you and judging. Tsk Tsk.
Flash forward to now and Jude is getting rave reviews for his starring role in Hamlet over in London. And his hair doesn't look as offensive as a few years ago and he's looked better than he has in a long time.
Then I see a pic of him signing for fans outside the theater in a sheer black shirt. With buttons. And a collar. (Not that it would be okay if it were a sheer black tee, but OMG someone put a collar and buttons on that mess and thought that would make it okay? It doesn't.
As if you weren't dead to me before, Jude.
He may as well have been wearing sandals.
UGH.
I know I haven't posted in a few days and my inbox has been flooded with good wishes and questions as to my whereabouts. Well, first of all, BACK OFF! I answer to no one. Secondly, work has been busy and annoying.
Thanks for your concern, George Glass, and others. Appreciate it!
Thursday, July 02, 2009
Where has the time gone?
This week has gotten away from me. What with all the MJ coverage, a sale on Edy's at CVS, and the Yanks playing good baseball, I don't know which end is up.
But, you guys, Kevin Jonas got engaged. OMG! Can you believe it?
GAG! Next!
Neil Patrick Harris did such a good job hosting the Tony's, word is he has been asked to host the Emmy's in September. Love you, Neil. That would be fab and would help heal the painful memory of the five reality hosts from last year. Ugh. Still dry heave at the thought.
Unfortunately, I won't be trying for red carpet bleacher seats this year. In fact, I won't even be watching the ceremony live. (Don't fail me, TiVo!) On September 20th, I will be at Gillette Stadium watching U2 on fold out chairs and cursing people that are tall. Word to all: I will cut anyone that gets on another person's shoulders and blocks my view. You have been warned, dumb girls with dumb boyfriends who will tailgate in the parking lot and then try to make life miserable for those of us who are too old to put up with your crap. Old bitches can be scary and I will not tolerate nonsense.
Happy 4th, everyone!
But, you guys, Kevin Jonas got engaged. OMG! Can you believe it?
GAG! Next!
Neil Patrick Harris did such a good job hosting the Tony's, word is he has been asked to host the Emmy's in September. Love you, Neil. That would be fab and would help heal the painful memory of the five reality hosts from last year. Ugh. Still dry heave at the thought.
Unfortunately, I won't be trying for red carpet bleacher seats this year. In fact, I won't even be watching the ceremony live. (Don't fail me, TiVo!) On September 20th, I will be at Gillette Stadium watching U2 on fold out chairs and cursing people that are tall. Word to all: I will cut anyone that gets on another person's shoulders and blocks my view. You have been warned, dumb girls with dumb boyfriends who will tailgate in the parking lot and then try to make life miserable for those of us who are too old to put up with your crap. Old bitches can be scary and I will not tolerate nonsense.
Happy 4th, everyone!
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