The Hills recap is not here today, friends. Or friend. Who is reading this?
Anyway, recapper extraordinaire, Jessica, is living the life of a socialite in San Diego and couldn't get her lazy/drunk ass motivated enough to write a review while on vacation. Put down the cosmo and get thee to a laptop, diva! Recaps wait for no one!
Well, actually they do. I was watching the Yankee game and forget this mess was on. Besides, I just read that Justin Bobby is dragging his non-showered body back next week. That will be the episode to watch! Clear your calendar and shut off your phone! Then OD on whatever you have in the house because you know you will feel guilty for having watched that nastiness voluntarily. It's going to be a busy Monday.
Oh, also, Ashlee and Pete are denying reports that Ash is with child. Yawn. The real bump watch continues to be Nicki Kidman. She accompanied Keith to the Country Music Awards, and I LOOK MORE PREGNANT THAN SHE DOES. What the hell? Methinks something is not right in the Land of Pale Ex's of Tommy C.
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